What Really Makes A Relationship Work?

Opposites attract, but does having commonalities increase compatibility?

Does having shared qualities make it easier to spark romance between two people? Or does being too the same redundant in any relationship?

The key to successful relationships doesn’t entirely rely on believing in the same life principles or agreeing all the time. Sure, you may consider each other your best friend, have an amazing chemistry, or really get each other. However, if your flaws are all too similar as well, the relationship will soon suffer. The bottom line is, compatibility relies more on how you and your partner complement each other. Much like a puzzle, it’s how your life pieces fit together that gives the picture sense. BBC in the article Is it better to be like your partner, tells us that AAmong many monogamous species, from cockatiels to cichlid fish, studies have revealed a clear pattern: it helps to be more similar to your mate. When mating pairs are behaviourally similar, their reproductive success tends to be higher.

Also ReadThe REAL Reason Why Some Couples Look Like Each Other?

Would you want to date an exact copy of who you are? Wouldn’t that be too predictable and mundane? But sure, it’ll make things easier because you’d easily understand each other. But there would be no balance as you’d both be dealing with the same issues, maximizing both your flaws.

The point is, alpha males don’t necessarily seek strong, successful, intelligent, or powerful women. What would matter most is how they feel around their woman. These men tend to gravitate towards women who are comfortable exuding their own femininity.

Common interests have really nothing to do with compatibility. What’s compatible is when you can both work around your differences to sustain the relationship. It is mostly about respecting each other’s own individuality and embracing your differences. It is really that simple.

Sure, you may tend to look for another person who can share your passion and hobbies. But these won’t be the basis of how successful your relationship will become. No matter how similar your personalities are if you lack the ability to communicate, spend quality time with each other, or don’t trust each other, then your relationship is doomed. Like any relationship you have to have boundaries but there also has to be a connection which is hard to define. Basically, you just seem to get along with each other. It’s an easy fit where long silences do not matter. I feel that this is the tell-tale sign of a great relationship where you can sit quietly with each other, not say anthing and be completely comfprtable with this. Yes, it takes hard work and effort to get there but this comfort level should happen naturally. Once you’re able to get there you’ll know it  and recognise it quickly and it’s a great feeling. Silence in the company of each other is golden and truly represents a great connection.

So don’t rely on just looking for a mirror-image of you; look for someone who makes you feel great and is as invested to make it long-term.

robyn nind - professional matchmaker

Robyn Nind is a dating coach and matchmaker at Blue Label Life. Robyn has helped countless singles find love and a partner.

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