How do explain the fact I have children to my date?

First of all, you should be proud of your achievements ESPECIALLY  your own children!

There are many family-focused men and women that are in a similar situation or would LOVE to have a relationship with a mum or dad of one or two or three for that matter.

Don’t assume just because you have children you are less desirable, in fact in most cases you are more desirable.  There are plenty of people who adore children, and who want to date someone with children.

Also read: 14 Questions You Should Definitely Ask Before Dating Someone With Kids

Stop thinking of yourself as a parent but think of yourself as a vibrant, energetic adult who deserves to have a social life!

To assist the transition of single-parent think of yourself as a sexy and available eligible person. Boost your confidence with a new look, new hairstyle, clothes, great jeans. Give yourself permission to have a life and make room for that special someone!

Make a mental transition, you deserve a rich and fulfilling social life! It will benefit both you and your children as you spark into life! You can take care of your children but if you don’t take care of yourself physically and emotionally you will not be able to take care of them. If you’re sacrificing your social life for your children you are not doing them any favours, quite the opposite actually.

The BEST gift to your children is for you to have a healthy balanced happy adult life!

When should you bring up the topic of children?

The earlier the better. Be open, be yourself and embrace the fact that you have the beautiful gift of being a parent. It’s also important to see how family orientated a person is, this point. As a single parent ideally someone who shares similar family values is your best bet.

How much should you talk about your children?

Answer any questions that your date may have, but remember it is still date and the priority is to get to know your date. What makes them, tick, what they love and focus on your common interests. If all you do on your date is talking about your children it will appear as though you don’t have an identity. Plus, if you are dating a single man with no kids this may be a huge turn off for him. He might be fine with you having kids but going on and on about them is something he may find off-putting. Conversely, single women with no kids may find the same natter about kids overly boring.

Your children are a fantastic filter! As an added bonus your children are a fantastic filter, if he or she runs for the hills early on that is a great thing, they weren’t who you wanted anyway. If they stay around it’s a great sign they are a keeper.

Be proud of your package never hide your children and make room for someone amazing!

robyn nind - professional matchmaker

Robyn Nind is a dating coach and matchmaker at Blue Label Life. Robyn has helped countless singles find love and a partner.

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