Picture this: A gorgeous house, fantastic partner, the champagne is flowing, life is spontaneous, and you’re living your dream. It’s bliss!
Then one day the clouds come rolling in. Your world as you know it starts to crash around you and realise that you actually have nothing in common with this person.
You no longer have the electric feelings and similar dreams. What you once found cute suddenly becomes annoying. All you want to do is get away and find yourself again. What happened? The honeymoon is over! Are you destined to be single forever?
The scenario above sounds familiar to most of us, but why does it happen?
When it comes to love, opposites don’t attract
Problems tend to occur when we begin dating an “opposite.” When a relationship commences solely on physical attraction, it doesn’t leave a very strong foundation for a long term relationship.
Sexual theorists claim that judgments based on immediate physical attraction are likely to contribute to high divorce rates. While the whole concept of “opposites attract” is both exciting and exhilarating, once the honeymoon is over, we begin to wonder what it was in the first place that we were once attracted to.
Relationship Radar (RR): The science of compatibility
The Relationship Radar (RR) was developed in 2010 by dating expert Samantha Jayne, in conjunction with Australia’s leading relationship psychologists.
The RR takes all the questions we as Australians would like to ask our partner, but somehow never find an appropriate moment to do so. Questions like; “Do I want a family, and if so, when can I envisage myself having children?”, or “How easily do you trust someone?” There’s even a question asking which one of your family members that you’re most like!”
The test looks at 50 issues relating to attitudes, values and behaviours that contribute to the breakdown of both long and short term relationships. These issues include:
- Family
- Hobbies/Interests
- Dating
- Sex
- Work
- Travel
- Lifestyle habits
- Psychological habits
- Emotional habits
After an in-depth analysis, studies show that:
- Higher RR compatibility has been proven to give those people a better chance of long-term relationship success.
- Happily married people had higher RR scores than those whose relationships weren’t so satisfactory.
- Couples who shared the same view on career satisfaction and income earnings are eight times as likely to be happy as couples with different views on this issue.
- Couples who share the same attitude toward traveling are almost four times as like to be happy as those who disagree with the issue.
- Women married to men who share the same view on household chores as themselves are three times more likely to express happiness with their marriage.
- Men’s satisfaction does not appear to be affected by whether or not their wife has a different career path.
So there you have it. Next time you are entering your new and exciting relationship ensure you check to see if you share the fundamental values of life, whilst they may not seem important in the honeymoon period they are essential for a happy long-lasting relationship!
