How to find love after heartbreak

When your heart gets shattered after a breakup or divorce, how do you put the pieces back together again?

Many heartbroken individuals fear opening themselves up to another relationship because they don’t want to get hurt again.

The good news is with time, many do find that the heartbreak passes and they are able to love once again.

Here we will discuss how to love again after heartbreak.

1) Get rid of things that remind you of your past love

When trying to get over an old relationship it helps to get rid of anything in the home that reminds you of the person who broke your heart. This includes; love letters, gifts, photos and other mementos – even jewellery! When your heart is hurting it’s easy to gaze upon these things and reflect on happy memories of better days with your ex, but doing this will not help you move on to find new love. Don’t let past relationships ruin the chances of finding love in the present.

If you can’t bring yourself to throw away or sell these old mementos, at least keep them out of sight. Put them in a box in a closet or in storage. Don’t forget to delete old lovey-dovey e-mails and text messages either.


2) Take some time to grieve the old relationship

While it’s tempting to jump immediately into another relationship after a breakup or divorce, it’s usually better to take some time to heal from the most recent relationship. Use your newfound free time to get centred and take care of yourself. Think bubble baths, exercise, meditation and new hobbies. It’s ok to feel down and depressed. Allow time for this and don’t stand in the way of your feelings. They will ease as time marches on.

3) Don’t isolate yourself

It’s hard to find love again if you hardly ever leave home or socialise. Don’t sit around the house moping over your ex. Get out there and spend time with friends. go to the gym, for a walk or start a new hobby but don’t let self-pity become a destructive influence in your life. Just remember, you are stronger than you think and you will get through these tough times. All you can do is move on with your life, keep yourself busy and try to stop dwelling on him or her.  You might think this is impossible, but in time everything heals. It will just be a scar that once used to hurt but it’s just a scar now. Keep this in mind when you start to feel those pains and memories coming back.

4) Realise that love is always a risk

The hardest part of loving again after heartbreak is the fear of getting hurt again. You have to ask yourself; is it worth the possibility of pain again? Accept that love is a risk and there’s a chance you could get hurt, but that the potential benefits of fulfilment and happiness often make those risks worth it.

5) Sign up with a dating agency

Yes, we are a dating service but, if you have been out of a relationship for some time and are still feeling down, then the best thing you can do is join up with a dating service. It’s a great way to get those relationship wheels turning and will create new opportunities for you. Rather than feel sorry for yourself, it’s an excellent relationship kickstarter, and who knows where it will lead to?

robyn nind - professional matchmaker

Robyn Nind is a dating coach and matchmaker at Blue Label Life. Robyn has helped countless singles find love and a partner.

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