Not getting a second date? Find out why…

First dates can be nerve-wracking.

I can’t tell you how many awkward/inappropriate lines have flown out my mouth – those lines that leave you red-faced and wanting to find the nearest bathroom window to climb out of or run out of the restaurant.

As much as I’d like to encourage my clients to give people three chances to impress, others are not so forgiving. If you’re consistently getting bad feedback from first dates, chances are you’re making one of the five common first date mistakes. They are:

1. Talking about “the ex”
2. Getting too deep, too soon – talking about your finances, business or politics
3. Revealing too much, too soon
4. Frustration/negativity – bagging your past dating experiences
5. Body language – we all know what arms crossed means.

Luckily, these are all easily fixed.

The answer lies with preparation. One of the biggest mistakes people make is a lack of preparation. It’s been said that first dates are like a job interview. And it’s true.

Think about everything from the clothes you wear to the smell of your hair. Think about your go-to conversation starters. Your favourite holiday, your favourite childhood memory, your most adventurous experience, what you would like to see in the world – these are the stories that are exchanged on a first date, so be prepared with an answer!

Remember when you first started dating? There were no ex’s to talk about, meaning no basis for comparison, no negativity because you are just happy to be out there. You didn’t reveal your entire life story because you were a nervous wreck.

Also read: 22 First Date Questions that are winners!

Small talk was more than enough to get you through the movie. Remember these moments and remind yourself when you begin to let life’s worries get in the way of the simple pleasure of conversation.

What do you think is the main reason for not getting a second date? What are some of the deal-makers and deal-breakers during a first date?  I’d love to go through these when I meet you. So if your a single man or single woman looking for a partner, I am here to help!

robyn nind - professional matchmaker

Robyn Nind is a dating coach and matchmaker at Blue Label Life. Robyn has helped countless singles find love and a partner.

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